Quick lessons in spa etiquette

Last year, on a trip to Sri Lanka, we took a leisurely tour of a lush green spice garden. With the aroma of spices wafting generously in the air, our host and his colleague decided to give us a complimentary massage. Now that was really kind of them but right in the middle of just a thick green cover, on a rickety old bench, a massage just didn’t seem right. I backed out, opting for a neck massage instead while my companion got some blood flowing in his arms, back and neck. I didn’t mind taking in the pleasures of the ambience, the sound of birds and leaves rustling leisurely in acres and acres of land while sipping on some wonderful spice tea with a drop of vanilla essence.
And then the phone rang. Just when everything was going right, the mobile rang and a pop song by INXS disturbed everything. It was blasphemous and I was disgusted that I hadn’t remembered to keep it on a silent mode. The host, who had been courteous with us till then, glowered while my companion cursed. And that was my first lesson in spa manners, especially when someone with me was enjoying his massage so thoroughly.
If you’re the sort of person who insists on mixing business calls with the pleasures of a great spa experience, read on. And if you thought there’s no term like “spa etiquette,” definitely read this piece closely. Rule number one, put your phone either on silent or switched off mode but don’t even think of taking or making any calls.
And this should happen before or after you’ve arrived at the spa. You should take it for granted that you have to be there at least 15 minutes before your scheduled appointment and not 30 minutes later. Well-known beautician Ambika Pillai, for instance, used to (I’m sure she still does) pass a complete list to clients who booked her for their makeup schedule. I don’t recall exactly but the gist of it all was this: “Wax your legs and arms, bleach your face and get a good facial at least three days before your scheduled appointment with us. Arrive 30 minutes before the scheduled time.”
One might argue that makeup is a different story and spa treatment another. Unfortunately, no, it isn’t that different. Remember how hairstylists often insist on a good hair wash on the day of a haircut session? The same rule applies here. Ladies, wax your legs before heading for that dream spa session. Let the aromatic oils flow and breathe directly into the skin and not shine on unwanted hair. Men, you’re lucky but it wouldn’t hurt to scrub your feet, right? A lot of spas will advice you not to wear deodorants. That’s because they’d rather let you enjoy the natural oils that they apply generously. But that doesn’t mean you carry that body odour with you. Instead take a shower just before you’re headed towards your destination and dab a hint of talcum powder if you really sweat.
While spa treatment options are aplenty, you need to figure out, well in advance, what suits your skin type. So quit squealing the minute a gentle staff member starts giving you a scrub with sea salt that you suddenly realise you’re allergic to. Most spas have dermatologists who advice you on what treatment can work for you.
The reason why one presumes you’ll head to a spa is for an unforgettable, relaxing experience. And to put that simply, it may require you to shed some clothes. Most people know this thumb rule but in case you’re uncomfortable and would still like to enjoy yourself, choose treatments appropriately. At Ayush Ayurvedic Centre, where I’d been recently, the receptionist narrated an episode of a lady who, after walking into a massage room, immediately rushed out to complain that her masseur asked her to remove clothes. Be clear about these things so that you aren’t running away from the centre but walking out confidently after a relaxing experience.
Some spas allow a couple to experience a massage in the same room. Now this is obviously very convenient but please don’t even dream about yapping incessantly while your masseur requests you to remain quiet. That’s a given even if you’re alone in the room. And please don’t bother about requesting your music at the spa, especially if your favourites include Eminem. There’s another kind of music which most spas don’t allow; children wailing and howling, “Mummmmy.” You cannot reach with your children and their nanny in tow to a spa. And you definitely cannot complain if the receptionist politely asks either you, or your children, or all of you to leave.
Have fun at the spa.
• A spa isn’t a call centre where you’ll shout into your mobile phone
• Children can have fun at an amusement park. Spa’s anything but that
• Clothes are usually shed for spa treatments. No one’s playing dirty here
• Quit shouting at the top of your voice here. There are others at the spa too. Even if your masseur needs to be told something, be firm but polite.
• You know what treatment can suit you best. If you’re prone to skin allergic make sure you speak with your doc well in advance
• Sure you’re paying a lot of money to have someone else pamper you. But scrubbing your feet and getting rid of body odour and unwanted hair wouldn’t really hurt, would it?
• Don’t insist on loud music and latest chartbusters. A spa isn’t your regular discotheque.

Picture courtesy Kanatal Spa